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Story from Daughter’s Point of View

My Mother Cloudia Leslie Wells known to her family by Leslie. was born August 10, 1953. She was the 5th child of 6 children to be concived.She was born and raised in State Park, Illinois. When my mother was 14 my grandparents really started noticing problems. Her running away from home, getting in alot of trouble at school. My grandparents took my mother to Barnes Hospital in St Louis and test were ran. The Doctors had comfirmed my grandparents worst nightmare They found she had Paranoid Schitzoprenia. The Doctor explained to my Grandparents that my mother had a very High IQ. And her brain could tilt one way and should could be a brilliant genius. Or it could tilt another way and she could be completly crazy. They did everything the doctors said to do. they gave her medicine, and even took her in on many occations for shock treatment. our family was ignorant to her illiness.  She was diagnoised in the late 60’s. They didnt have the technology that they do today. When she was 17 she found out she was pregnant with me. My grandfather was beside himself. And demanded to know who the father was. To this day I still dont know who my biological Father is.  When I was about 9months old she married a man to give me a father and a last name. My mother at times seemed normal, and at other times she would get this wild look in her eye and she would do adnormal things. when I was about a year old I was admitted into the hospital for the flu. She had went to her family and said I was dead. Calling family home from work. even going as far as ordering flowers to be sent to the funeral home. When I was two her Husbands son had just got married and him and his wife were thinking on how to get me away from her and raise me themselves. When she learned what was going on she went to my Grandparents and asked them to adopt me. She was in fear her husband and his son and new wife were going to take me from her. My Grandparents agreed to adopt me. My grandfather did this under the condition if she ever straightened up and wanted me back i was still and always would be her daughter. (this part was short lived) After my mom knew i was safe with her parents she left home. this is when she started disappearing in and out of my life. In the mean time while she was gone my Grandmother was in so much fear of my Grandfather letting my mom have me back, that she made sure I would hate my mom growing up. Instead of explaining to me my mother had a mental illiness. she would say things like who loves you more, whos baby girl are you, she never loved you. She was mean to you. she left you. Were your parents now. and you are our 7th and youngest child. And Im your mom and she is your sister. ect,ect. I grew up hating my mother with every breath in me. I didnt trust her. And i always knew she would never straighten up. and that it was just a matter of time before she was gone again. It also didnt help matters to family members who were ignorant to her illiness, to say stay away from her. dont have anything to do with her shes crazy. or to hear them say your going to be just like her when you grow up. Those things were hard as a child. so I put up this wall! As i was growing up she would come in and out of my life. disapearing months or a year at a time. sometimes even as long as 3 or 4 years. but she always came back home. each time she would come back no one ever questioned where she had been. some of the family was glad she was home. And didnt want to say anything to upset her in fear she would leave again. When she was home family started noticing other things about my mother. She had photographic memory. Only 1% of the population have this. She could look at how you wrote your name and would rewrite it on a peice of paper. and it looked just like your own hand writing. She also had many diffrent alaises when she would leave with drivers license.and ID crads in someone elses name. but with her picture. When she would leave home she would just up and leave saying she was running to the store or a baby shower. and she would be back later. leaving behind all of her belongings even at times her purse and just start over. And you wouldnt hear from her again for a year or two at a time. The last time she left home was in Jan of 1995. I was 23 years old. No one put in a missing persons report. she always left and came back. Just ask me i could have told you the crazy nut was leaving. the months turned into years and before we knew it 10 years had passed. At this time i was living in Alabama. Now for the first time i knew something was wrong. she had never been gone this long. I was going back home to illinois to go see one of my friends children Graduate. I had never filed a missing report on her before. but i knew now it had to be done. and it had to be done the last place we had seen her. So when i went back home to visit. I also visited the police station in the city my mother had lived in before she disapeared. I had a hard time filling out the report i had never done anything like this before. I had the spelling of her name wrong. I always thought she spelled her first name Claudia. Only to learn its really spelled Cloudia. I had trouble explaining to the police that she had done this many times before but never this long. and i had a hard time explaining why i had waited so many years to report her missing. But i got thru this and she was now in the system. They explained to me she was an adult, they didnt think foul play was involved. but if she were ever pulled over i would be notified that she was okay. they didnt have to disclose her location because she is an adult. It was up to her to contact us. But they would call if she had been located. more Years went pass without hearing anything. She was in the system now, and it just wasnt looking good. So I went to My sisters house Thanksgiving 2010 (please remember this was how i was brought up my sister is also Leslies sister. I was my biological mom’s only daughter) My sister sat me down and we talked we talked about my mothers illiness. I researched it for the first time, and started understanding more. Leslie had now been missing now almost 16 years. we hadn’t herd from her. The police haven’t found anything. She has never been gone for this period of time. It’s time to have a memorial Service. That we needed some type of clouser. So we had talks of planning one when the weather got warmer maybe spring. In the mean time i go back home and still surf the net like i always do. in Jan 2011 i logged into a site called mylife. it searches for people. I put in my mothers name like i always do…Well this time a miracle happened. It only happened this one time. Im not sure why it happened or how it happened and it hasnt happened since. but when i typed in my moms name for some reason this site thought i was her. The site asked me a security question. it asked me what was my address in cloumbia, Missouri in 1998. Well i sure didnt know the answer. But i did know she had been missing since 1995. This was the first break thru that got the ball rolling. The first thing i did was call my sister, she told me i needed to call the police in illinois right away and told them what i found. I talked to a detective on the phone That remembered my moms case. He told me they never thought it was foul play and if she didnt want to be found she wont be. and like they told me before she was still in the system. If she ever were pulled over they would let me know she was okay. i asked then well where do i go from here. He told me my best bet was to call the police dept in columbia,mo. and see if they could help me or find anything. So thats what i did. the detective their was very helpful. he told me my mother had lived their for 5 months in 1998 leaving around oct. But he couldnt find her missing in the system. he asked me if she could be in their under a diffrent name. then I remembered i had spelled her first name wrong. I knew that had to be it, and never thought anymore of it. I was on a mission for the first time in my life. I was a spoiled bratt. I never gave my mom a chance. I was raised to hate her. but as an adult i was just as ignorant as the rest. Because i still continued with the hate and anger i was raised with. I started researching her illiness, i started understanding she had no controll and this wasnt her fault. I started feeling love and feelings for my mom that i had  hid away ever since i was a chilld. And Now i was on a mission, for the first time i was going to find my mom if it was the last thing i did. I was going to look her in the eye and say I Love you and mean it. I was going to let her know she did what she thought was right. She protected me and gave me to her parents to adopt because she knew i would be safe with them. She may have been mentally ill, but she always wanted to make sure i was safe!  So I started with setting her up a facebook page. Family members that had always bashed her including siblings i deleated and blocked from my page and hers. My neice that lives in Tx  sends me a link she asked me to look at. it was a site called Namus. Their was no picture but their was my mothers name switched around instead of it being cloudia Leslie wells it was under Leslie C Wells. her birthday was off. but everything else sounded like her. I knew in my gut and heart this had to be my mom. so I called San Diego police dept. And i spoke with the detective their. my mom had vanished leaving a homless shelter. I asked for the shelters number in hopes someone still might work their that remembered my mom. I told the det I know you dont have a picture of her. But im almost possitive this is her. She said actually Robin we do have a picture of her in our file. we just never put it on Namus. she asked to look at my pictures of my mom first. I directed her to my moms fb page. she said she wasnt sure she was sending me the picture she had. As soon as i opened up her emai; i was staring right at my mom. I called the det right back and comfirmed this was my mom. She went missing from the shelter in the spring of 1998. now i knew where she was at that whole year. first in san diego, ca. then Columbia,Mo. the police in California finally had a real name to this face. Now they knew who she was. I had missing advocates and radio talk shows from all over willing to help me and give my mom exposure. I was scheduled to go on one of these talk shows, and they asked for my moms NCIC number..Thats her missing number. I said i didnt know it. And how do i obtain it. they told me the police dept where i filed her missing would have it. I called Illinois police dept and the det wasnt in. But the dispatcher said she could give that info to me. she went to get it and came back on the line and informed me my mother didnt have a NCIC…She wasn’t in their system as missing on my police report i did not give them enough info. I was shocked and Angry now it made since why she couldnt be found in the system. I had been lied to. the dispatcher asked if  she could take my phone number and a message. I told her absolutly not. I hung up the phone dumb founded to say the least. the next morning at 7 am my phone was ringing off the hook. it was the police dept in Illinois. I answered and it was the same det that i had talked to when i filled out my moms report. and the same man who i had spoke to just a month prior about my findings in Columbia, Mo. When I answer the phone he starts asking me what seems to be the problem. I told him i never asked for you to call. But why i have you on the phone why was i lied to. He told me i had misunderstood. I told him no i did not. you told me she was in the system, that if she were pulled over you would notify me but you didnt have to disclose her location. he said he never told me that. i told him they record their calls go back and listen to our conversation from last month. he then turns the conversation on me. Telling me what kind of family waits over 10 years to file a missing persons report. and I never had enough info for them to do anything with. he bet i still didnt have her social. I said the det in mo found that out the same day. he wanted the det name and number. He said he would get back with me. That was the last time i ever herd from Illinois again about my mom. I called California and told the det their what was going on. She said for me not to worry. They have had my mom in the system as missing since 1998 and she did have a NCIC number, and it was givin to me then. I called the talk show with all the info. Everything was set for me to go on air. The day before i was to go on the producer of the show calls to tell me i wasnt going on because they had found my mother. That she was alive and well. Living in Vermont as a care giver. That she lived with another couple in a nice home. She said she couldnt give me the location because that was against the law. she asked for me to write my mom a letter and she would mail it to her. and it was up to my mom now to respond. that she would send all her info to the det in California. So they can comfirm this. This information never was confirmed the talk show started ignoring all emails and phone calls from me or the police in San Diego. So we were back to square one again. The police has had a few leads but it either wasnt her, or she didnt live their anymore. The last comfirmed time she has used her social was in Tempe Arizonia in 2005. I wont give up, I have found out a great deal about my mother in the last year. I have had a dna kit done on myself that California now has, It’s my contiued mission to keep searching and to never give up. And to have that one chance to let my mom know that i did have a good life, that she always did her best to protect me. And i Love her with all my heart. The Picture i have posted is the same picture that the police dept in California sent me. I am sure her apperance has changed even more thru the years. But this is the last photo I have on her it was taken in 1998. In My heart I know my mother is still out their. Please help me find her!




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